February 19, 2010

"The government in the Indian state of Meghalaya has confiscated textbooks showing pictures of Jesus Christ holding a cigarette and a can of beer."

"Jesus Christ is central to Christian faith and Christian life. The attempt to tarnish his image is highly objectionable and goes against the spirit of religious tolerance in India."

Because disrespecting religion is the main problem here. As opposed to: How the hell does such insane nonsense get into a school textbook?

What was the subject to be taught from the book? Cursive writing. Oh, do we even need cursive writing anymore? Come on. Get with it. We don't need cursive writing. We need cigarettes and beer:


Or wine. Jesus was more of a wine advocate.

70 comments:

DaveW said...

What was the subject to be taught from the book?

Well, at least we know it isn't just *our* public schools.

former law student said...

While Jesus may be a wine advocate, he's not the Wine Advocate.

Link text

Expat(ish) said...

My kids social studies book has Gary Larson and Pizarro cartoons in them.

I would have loved that as a kid.

-XC

Automatic_Wing said...

Canned beer is definitely not worthy of the messiah. Unless it's one of those Guiness cans with the little CO2 thingy in the bottom.

Ann Althouse said...

New wine must be poured into new wineskins. Beer? Just drink it out of the can.

Anonymous said...

You don't approve of silly things in serious settings, do you, Althouse?

Anonymous said...

He was a wine advocate only because they hadn't figured out how to make beer yet.

Wikitorix said...

Maguro, those things are officially called widgets. So every economics textbook appears to be highly concerned with getting the proper amount of head on a particular brand of Irish Stout.

Maybe they call econ the 'dismal science' because its practitioners are all hungover. And Guiness hangovers are no fun, I can assure you.

veni vidi vici said...

What, no spattering of dung?

Anonymous said...

I meant the BUD Light of the world!

former law student said...

Beer was being brewed in the middle east at least by 1800 BC. Maybe that was the "strong drink" of the Old Testament.

History of Ninkasi at Anchor Steam website

Link text

Chennaul said...

Crap now we know where downtownlad lives, and what he does for a living.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Guiness hangovers are no fun, I can assure you.

Hangovers and what causes it differ from person to person.

Guinness gives me no hungover whatsoever.

DaveW said...

...they hadn't figured out how to make beer yet.

Nah, they had beer well before Jesus' time.

Perhaps grapes were just easier to grow in the region.

Chennaul said...

hungover....

Lem! Quit braggin'...

Automatic_Wing said...

Canned beer sucks. Would you drink canned wine?

Anonymous said...

His drinking buddies have just bet Him that He can't get that Camel through the eye of a needle.

The Crack Emcee said...

"We need cigarettes and beer,..."

Then you got it!!

Michael said...

I'm OK with the picture myself. Christ was a working class guy and would probably have a tattoo if he were around today. I am not big on the piss Christ art movement but this picture doesn't incite me to anything other than a smile. I will stare at the picture and try and work on my cursive, which can use it.

Unknown said...

And, of course, we all know what would be happening if the picture were of Mohammed.

TMink said...

As I read the story, I was a little offended, as I looked at the photo, I laughed out loud. Something about it really makes me laugh. So much for being a Christianist I guess.

Oh, and wasn't Jesus more of a wine producer than a wine advocate?

And I have not written in cursive since the 1980s. Not even I can read it.

Trey

Bender said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bender said...

To be sure, it may seem a bit silly, but I really cannot find the humor in it when one considers the rampant anti-Christian persecution in India, especially in Orissa, including --
Countless churches and shops burned; orphanages attacked; priests and nuns attacked and killed; anti-Christian riots; confiscation of Bibles and other religious materials; and firebombing of homes. Thousands of Christians have been forced from their homes.

Given all that, this is kind of like finding humorous situations in Ku Klux Klan lynchings. Ha, ha, ha.

Maybe we can find some silly book from Rwanda about the Tutsis?

Paddy O said...

I'm a little mixed on this one.

I like the beer and cigarette. It's the blond hair and European features that bother me.

The beer and cigarette are very incarnational. Jesus was accused of gluttony and drunkenness. He was a friend of sinners and tax collectors. He was offensive to those who had a severe morality. Instead of the distant, ethereal Jesus, this helps bring him back into humanity.

At the same time, though, in India I wonder how those in other religious would view this. A sign of disrespect? American immorality and the lax behavior of perceived Christians is a big turnoff to muslims who might otherwise show an interest in the underlying theological priorities in Christianity. So, oddly enough, I might be offended because not being offended might show Muslims we do not take our faith seriously.

Maybe I'm thinking too much.

I need a drink, and maybe a smoke.

Paddy O said...

Flexo, that gets at exactly my discomfort. So I agree with you.

Context is important.

AllenS said...

If Jesus smoked, he'd smoke a cigar. An expensive cigar. I'd like to have a Leinenkugel with Jesus. If Jesus was over for a beer, I'd have to ask him to smoke outside. I bet he'd understand, and not strike me down with a lightning bolt. Jesus is a good man.

Anonymous said...

I thought it was just the Egyptians who had beer. I don't remember hearing much about it in the Bible, but then I'm a Catholic and we don't memorize Bible verses. I'll have to ask a Baptist friend. Except they claim that's not real wine in the Bible, it's grape juice.

Wince said...

I think Thomas put him up to it, daring him to shotgun a beer and blow smoke rings out his side.

Penny said...

Why did it turn up in a textbook? Perhaps because the publisher knows that kids seem to prefer humorous learning to that stodgy serious stuff. It's the "Entertain Me" age, after all.

Anonymous said...

You mean Thomas said, "I doubt you can do this?"

AllenS said...

Some people in India are going to hell.

chickelit said...

Beer was being brewed in the middle east at least by 1800 BC. Maybe that was the "strong drink" of the Old Testament.

Wasn't mead the preferred strong drink of choice back in the day?

Distilled spirits had yet to be invented.

wv: calittle (now that's cute and clever)

garage mahal said...

Buddhism. LOL.
Is this possible liberal a possible terrorist in this possible terrorist act?
Buddhism. Still sucks.
Bill Clinton eats pussy!
See poor Jesus forced to hold a smoke and a beer. Are Indians Buddhists??

jimbino said...

That guy holding the beer and cigarette was a Jew: born a Jew, went to Temple as a Jew, died a Jew.

Why isn't the picture an assault on Jews?

chickelit said...

Hangovers and what causes it differ from person to person.

Resistance is fusel. Or not.

Chennaul said...

I never get hungover from beer...probably because I throw up first.

Heh.

traditionalguy said...

India is a trip. There are 17 major language groups in India The communicate by all learning English as an extra language. There are 1000+ gods that are respected, including Jesus of the Christians. They are darker skinned than say Norwegans, but they are racially classed as Caucasian. Already that explains many contradictions in what we have percieved about India from the American experience out of British Empire propaganda films. Maybe Indians also watch too much propaganda like MTV's Jersey Shores supposed to be real Catholic kids gone wild, and then there are films of New Orleans on Mardis Gras. Yet we see Jesus accused of eating and drinking with sinners, when he wasn't making 60 more gallons of wine when the guests at a feast were already too drunk to appreciate his Galilee Valley Blended wine.

Chennaul said...

This:

The term hangover was originally a 19th century expression describing unfinished business—something left over from a meeting—or "survival." In 1904, the meaning "morning after-effect of drinking too much" first surfaced.

[Just because I got hung up on the meaning of hungover..]

Amexpat said...

Cursive writing and a profane picture. There's a pun to be made here.

Chennaul said...

Ancient proverb:
When tossing your cookies, you could end up praying to the porcelain god.

former law student said...

Except they claim that's not real wine in the Bible, it's grape juice.

It's both. Grape juice will be completely fermented out within three days after the grapeskins are broken, because of the yeast on the skin. In the absence of refrigeration or pasteurization, the juice will become wine. In contrast to the difficulties involved in reserving grape juice, the fermented product stores quite well.

former law student said...

preserving, not reserving.

AllenS said...

Oh, you meant reserving, you wanted all the wine to yourself.

Penny said...

Wonder if the kids jumped to the conclusion that American Jesus had more fun than Indian Jesus?

ricpic said...

Why is Christ always depicted as effeminate?

Daniel Fielding said...

If I am not mistaken, the school in question was the one I graduated from, St Edmunds College First, people in that State take their Christianity seriously,and secondly, given all the anti-Christian bigotry going on all over India, I am not surprised to see the folks in Meghalaya are a bit defensive.
I thnk 18 or 19 of the Indian States have passed "non-conversion" laws, that prohibit an Indian national living in the given State converting to Christianity. These are laws passed under pressure from Hindu Fundamentalists,and thus, Christians in Indian are a bit sensitive.

Hindu fundamentalists are equaly as bad as the Taliban and al-Qaeda and the Nazis put together.

Anonymous said...

making 60 more gallons of wine when the guests at a feast were already too drunk to appreciate his Galilee Valley Blended wine.

Which is why that whole thing about, "Wow! What a great host that Cana guy is! He saved his best wine for last!" is such baloney. Because nobody saves his best wine for last because the good wine is wasted on drunk people.

As far as Baptists and wine/grape juice, just make sure you always take at least two Baptists fishing so they won't drink your beer. Or your grape juice.

former law student said...

Because nobody saves his best wine for last because the good wine is wasted on drunk people.

That's the point. That Jesus wine was so superior that even the drunk ass people could appreciate its superiority.

Anonymous said...

I want to see Jesus make chocolate out of water. Then I'd be impressed. This being Lent and me being on day 3 of no chocolate and all. Hey. If Church of Christ people don't have musical instruments in their services because there weren't any musical instruments in the Bible (Joshua blew his horn? Hello?) how come they can eat chocolate? Huh? There is no chocolate in the Bible. NONE.

knox said...

Jesus, the partier.

Anonymous said...

He sure wasn't all holier than thou. I'd have him at a party. He'd be handy if you ran out of booze. Or wanted the moneychangers thrown out.

Anonymous said...

Or ran out of fish. If someone drank too much and needed to be revived. He'd make the Marthas stop cleaning and join the party. He wouldn't let people gossip and get all judgmental. He'd say, "No, you let me do that later. Just go on about your business and have another dolma. Hey, want to hear a good story?"

He'd be fun. I would totally have him around.

AllenS said...

I'll bet that Jesus has a good sense of humor, too. That story about his dad taking a rib from Adam and then making Eve, well, let's face it, how many laughs could that generate around a table of men drinking beer?

AllenS said...

And the Dalai Lama. What's he got? He's got nothing. He doesn't even have a country. Tiger Woods might be making a big mistake.

former law student said...

I'd have him at a party.

As long as you didn't have any unproductive fruit trees in the backyard. Those set Him off, for some reason.

traditionalguy said...

Did you hear the story of the British Empire's ships going to India had such a long trip (Pre-Suez canal) that normal English beer went bad. So the doubled up on the Hops which worked as a preservative and thereby created a loved, acquired bitter tasting brew we call India pale ale (IPA).

Anonymous said...

AllenS, you know those guys would be all over that Adam and Eve story, wondering what other parts Adam could have spared. Besides his spare rib.

Anonymous said...

Traditional guy, Isn't it just taking fruit from a tree that gets you in trouble?

Penny said...

"Why is Christ always depicted as effeminate?"

Effeminate? Jesus was a mighty handsome hippie to some of my athiest boomer friends.

Unknown said...

traditionalguy said...

...

They are darker skinned than say Norwegans, but they are racially classed as Caucasian.

Not to pick, but I think you mean Aryan, not Caucasian; the linguistic group is also classed as Indo-Aryan. As to skin tone, depends on where you are. On the Indo-Pak border, there are some people who are the same shade as, say, Sicilians, or lighter (one of my college profs eons ago; God, she was beautiful). Then there are Bengalis are as dark as any African, but the physiognomy is different.

R.L. Hunter said...

The idea of Jesus saying "hold my beer and watch this" when he does a miracle strikes me as funny.

Penny said...

LOL Me too, Hunter. Whereupon, after his first miracle, his drinking buddies scream "Holy cow!" And sure enough, in strolls a Brahman sporting a crucifix.

Anonymous said...

Penny, the Holy Land in Wisconsin includes the towns of Jericho, Mt Calvary, St Anna, St Joe, St Peter, and New Holstein.

You know.

Holy Cow.

Bender said...

I see the last acceptable prejudice is proudly on display.

Penny said...

Au contraire, Flexo. Jesus sent in a SKINNY Brahman.

But, duh...aren't they all? That's hardly a miracle, Mister Hey Zeus.

madAsHell said...

disrespecting!?!? really??

I'm sorry to see that this has "stupidly" entered your vocabulary.

I'm sure irregardless is next.

Sorry, I judge people by their English. I save a lot of time that way.

How can you have such pin-point analysis, and still suffer from MTV influences?

former law student said...

Sorry, I judge people by their English. I save a lot of time that way.

Disrespect has been used as a transitive verb since 1614. Are not four centuries of usage enough?


Merriam-Webster Online

traditionalguy said...

Edutcher...Just got back to the comments, and see your on the usual double meanings to the Aryan and Caucasian words. Usage capitalises these words as if they are substantial facts. They both come from Ethnic Study first popular 150 years ago in European Universities. They use different methods of study and came to differing assertions defined by the same words: "Caucasian"ancestry based its facts on the all time popular skull measurement techniques, but "Aryan" ancestry based its facts on deciphering the etymology of language groups and posited the existence of a mother tongue it called Indo-European. Perhaps the DNA boys will finally bring reliable facts into this ancestry game, but in the meantime each culture likes to claim their ethnic superiority...especially among "Whites" in northern Europe and in their new world migration here. So the Indian subcontinent also can lay claim under both theories of ancestry to origins shared with the Whites by the skull measurement criteria and by language etymology critera. I throw that into discussians only because it helps free us from the "Skin Color Tells All" mind set that has hindered rational thought about other cultures here in the South. The old Romance Languages category certainly merged many shades of skin tones/ colors and was from the same mother tongue showing some evidence of common ancestry. I stick to Atlanta's motto: Let's sell the world a Coke and sing in harmony.

Jim S. said...

It doesn't bother me as a Christian. The only thing that really offends me is that it was in a book on a completely unrelated topic. It reminds me of part 1 of The Abolition of Man by C. S. Lewis, where he starts off by showing how some books on English grammar ignore that topic, and instead advocate very controversial philosophical claims, without any indication of the contentious nature of their claims. You can read it online: http://www.columbia.edu/cu/augustine/arch/lewis/abolition1.htm

kentuckyliz said...

I hope the essay was about how you can't publish any image of Mohammed, serious or poking-fun, without inspiring worldwide riots and death threats.

Christians have a sense of humor.

Look for Big Butter Jesus on You Tube.

Evangelicals and their grape juice fantasies! The pasteurization of grape juice to stop fermentation wasn't invented until 1869.

Never saw this until I lived in Baptistland: drive through liquor stores where the drive through lane is covered! So your neighbors and church friends don't see.

I park in the Catholic parking, out front, walk right in, make eye contact, smile, and say hi, and make my purchase. No big hat, wig, sunglasses, trench coat. Unabashed.

If Christ has set me free, no one can enslave me.