September 9, 2014

"Over the years, Mr. Roberts has developed a series of strategies for getting his wife out of bed earlier."

"He'll yank the pillow out from under her head, set a cup of freshly-brewed coffee on her nightstand, yell from the kitchen to ask if she wants chocolate chips in her pancakes and even tell their 4-year-old, 'Mommy really wants to be tickled right now.'"

From "Couples on Different Sleep Schedules Can Expect Conflict—and Adapt/Some Couples May Decide to Sleep Apart, But Discuss It First and Make Time for Intimacy."

15 comments:

sinz52 said...

"Over the years, Mr. Roberts has developed a series of strategies for getting his wife out of bed earlier."

Nothing beats a bucket of ice water.

rhhardin said...

My strategy with the dog is to slide her off the bed. She'll automatically twist to point her paws floorward as she goes over the edge.

I'm not advising it, just pointing out a strategy.

Bart Hall (Kansas, USA) said...

To hell with "strategy". I'm a very light sleeper and we have two cats who always wish to eat at about 05:00. regardless of what they've had the night before. So I get up and feed the little bastards and get on with my day.

Which is fine by me because I'm a *very* early morning person. I used to do a radio show from 03:00 to 07:00 and I thoroughly enjoyed the hours.

My wife much prefers to go to bed later and sleep later in the morning. There are various ways we "enjoy" that waking period we each have in the middle of the night. Or, more commonly, it's her middle-wake, and after our time together I get up and get on with my day. At which point I ferociously defend her sleep against cats, dogs, and our 3 yo daughter.

David said...

"Captain, it is I, Ensign Pulver, and I just threw your stinkin' palm tree overboard!"

MadisonMan said...

I imagine the story that would have been written if it were the wife who was the early riser and the husband who slept late.

Kelly said...

My husband has always been an early riser, usually around 430, but he's tried to get up as early as 3. I tell him to lay back down, 3 is just ridiculous. I like to sleep late, though now that I'm older I don't sleep as late as I once did. 8 is sleeping in for me.

Our differences have never really mattered although its a bit annoying that as soon as dinner is over he's on the couch sleeping until I wake him up to go to bed. Our girls once painted his fingernails and another time they put make-up on him so he does provide some entertainment despite not participating in family time.

Anonymous said...

Of course, their is the Ray Rice Alarm Clock. One hell of a Snooze Button.

tds said...

let me understand, it is about people being assholes towards the others, right?

Anonymous said...

(there not their: cripes)

traditionalguy said...

They always said caffeine is an aphrodisiac, but I suppose waking them up in the morning is harder than keeping them up late.

Craig Landon said...

One of the very first things they told newly married naval aviation students in flight school in the mid-60s was to encourage their wives to get up when they did, visit together, and see them to the door, no matter the time, then re-rack, if desired. It would make a difference down the road.

Never applied to me -- marriage became career #2 -- but my unscientific observation over the years was that it did make a positive difference.

Always wondered if the subliminal message was "It's positive energy. He's going flying, and you never know..."

Big Mike said...

"Mommy really wants to be tickled right now."

Sir, she must really love you if she hasn't gotten a divorce lawyer by now.

Brian said...

We've outsourced the "what time to get up on Saturday" issue to our 3yo daughter. Like clockwork: "Daddy, it is DAY TIME. Get OUT OF BED." NLT than 6:45 AM.

And no, we can't trade off. Anything less than the whole house getting up with the sun is unsatisfactory. She even rousts the dogs.

Ann Althouse said...

"MASON CITY, IOWA—A pretty blonde bride’s playful tickling of her husband to get him out of bed to milk the cows led swiftly to tragedy early Tuesday. Mrs. Jennie Becker Brunner, 22, said through her tears in a Cerro Gordo County jail cell here late in the day that she shot and killed her husband, Sam Brunner, 26, with his .45 caliber U.S. Army Colt pistol. Mrs. Brunner said she and her husband quarreled after she tickled him under the arm to get him out of bed. —The Des Moines Register, November 19, 1953"

Bill Bryson, "The Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid: A Memoir" (p. 170).

FullMoon said...

Not hard to wake ant woman up at any time. Just dial her cell phone.
She gonna pop quicker than a teen age morning boner.