August 4, 2015

"I feel like I'm looking at the world through some sort of Oreo crème lens..."

"... and it's become my favorite medium to express my creativity through."

26 comments:

Scott said...

The thing that creeps me out about eating decorated food is the amount of handling that goes into its preparation. Would you actually eat an Oreo that some woman has been handling and breathing on for an hour?

The Food Network program Ace of Cakes is especially hideous. After witnessing the handling that the frosting and fondant has gone through, I wouldn't eat a piece of their damn cakes without a tetnaus shot afterward.

Laslo Spatula said...

Sublimated desire for bukkake.


I am Laslo.

sojerofgod said...

I don't really think that cookie was destined to be eaten. Kinda reminds me of the displays in the front window of a bakery, pretty, but probably stale.

Plus you are likely a germophobe so you got that going for ya.

madAsHell said...

Isn't Oreo a micro-aggression?

Scott said...

Do you know exactly how to eat an Oreo?
Well to do it, you unscrew it
very fast.
Cause a kid'll eat the middle of an Oreo first
and save the chocolate cookie outside for last.


--1960s television ad

Laslo Spatula said...

Identifying with the white filling, not the black cookie.

We all know what that means.


I am Laslo.

Laslo Spatula said...

I wonder if Miley Cyrus has ever been the 'creme filling' in an 'Oreo'.

Just thoughts.


I am Laslo.

Bob R said...

Stop playing with your food! There's starving children in Detroit!

tim in vermont said...

I really like the way photography has made ephemeral art like this practical.

tim in vermont said...

I wouldn't eat a piece of their damn cakes without a tetnaus shot afterward.

That's what Julia Childs said about modern cuisine arranged so beautifully on the plate.

MadisonMan said...

Bad metaphor. You can't look through the creme center of an oreo.

mikee said...

I, for one, await the artist's efforts with Oscar Meyer Weiners.
And Laslo's comments thereon.

I'll see myself out.

JAORE said...

If only Da Vinci had access to Oreos.

Art? Feh.

MayBee said...

The Food Network program Ace of Cakes is especially hideous. After witnessing the handling that the frosting and fondant has gone through, I wouldn't eat a piece of their damn cakes without a tetnaus shot afterward.

OMG, Scott! I thought I was alone!!!

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

Now would be as good a time as any to acknowledge the debt of gratitude I owe to the esteemed Mr. Spatula. Last night I was watching TV, and I caught the humor in a joke I might not have otherwise, and I got the belly laugh of a lifetime.

It was one of those Dos Equis commercials featuring the most interesting man in the world.

He's at his table, with two beautiful women, and their reaction is just the slightest bit sheepish as he delivers his line: "Every woman has a dark side, it is your job to find it."

MayBee said...

He's at his table, with two beautiful women, and their reaction is just the slightest bit sheepish as he delivers his line: "Every woman has a dark side, it is your job to find it."

I bet they've had to look at him through an "oreo cream" lens.

Bob Ellison said...

The world needs Oreo transparency. Literally, a transparent Oreo. Surely we have the food technology to make that happen, with gels and the like. Maybe more translucent than transparent. Then they could bring out rainbow-tinged Oreos.

Nabisco, get on this!

TrespassersW said...

Tetanus from food? I haven't seen the program in question, so I don't know: do they habitually lose rusty, dirty nails and other bits of point metal in the cakes?

Hammond X. Gritzkofe said...

Next project: White Oreo cop shooting or choking black Oreo personage.

ken in tx said...

I have read that the fancier the restaurant, the more people who have had their fingers in and on your food.

Tom Tucker said...

That was me, I played a year of football in college, and then moved down the sideline and cheered the next three years. I echo his comments on teamwork and the overall experience. It takes a tremendous amount of trust to allow yourself to be thrown seven feet in the air - strike and hold a position that will result in serious injury if you fall - and know that your partner will always catch you. It was the most equal, honest and respectful relationship I'd ever had with a woman.

Wilbur said...

Roy Jacobsen:
You're trying to think rationally about an irrational fear.

Nichevo said...

Yes, because the error "tetanus" allows you to ignore "ptomaine" and "E.coli" and "typhoid" and every OTHER human transmissible pathogen. I prefer a certain simplicity to the arrangement of my food.

cubanbob said...

And what about hepatitis? You have something against those virus?

Nichevo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Nichevo said...

I forgot plague, too. Tsk tsk, Nichevo, you knew 'twere invidious to particularize...