February 5, 2013

"Probably what it shows more than anything is how incredibly boring prison is."

"You've got to do something that fills in the day."

20 comments:

Chip S. said...

I stopped reading at "homemade penile implant".

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

I'd greatly admire the man who inserted ribs . . . for her pleasure.

madAsHell said...

My brother-in-law is a physician, and frequently works in the ER. You can't even begin to imagine what people stick up their butts.

Bob Ellison said...

Hmm. Penal penile implants.

MadisonMan said...

Ho-kay.

Glad about the absence of pictures.

Wince said...

Ever hear the one about the jailed stockbroker who gave himself a hot tip?

Freeman Hunt said...

No books up in these prisons?

Freeman Hunt said...

Being so bored you'll cut open your genitals and stick stuff under the skin is pretty bored. Maybe the problem isn't boredom. Maybe it's plain old impulsivity and poor decision making, the sort of stuff that gets one into prison in the first place.

RazorSharpSundries said...

Yeah, liberals always blame aberrant behavior on boredom but it's always invariably just a way to fuck up your life more than anything else. These poor antipodean penal colonists are just tryin' to get a leg up. They're just nonpareil shitheads.

Leland said...

MadasHell, ask your in-law if he's heard of piercing one's scrotum with a needle for inflating footballs/basketball and then "airing it up". My wife had one of those enter her ER. And this was a kid under 18 not in prison.

For those tempted by the thought, just note that the end result is not limited to the scrotum. The skin, detached from his arm, was described as crunchy to the touch. To understand what happens, watch "Swamp People" and learn how alligator hide is removed with compressed air.

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

With a mostly male cast of commenters I have three queries to pose to the good Professor:

1. Does the subject of males self (one would hope) implanting their penis appeal to Prof Althouse puriently?

2. Is Prof Althouse being an agent provcateur to her commenters?

3. Is it a slow news day?

Ann Althouse said...

"1. Does the subject of males self (one would hope) implanting their penis appeal to Prof Althouse puriently?"

I'm interested in things that are bizarre and disgusting... but only if they make it into mainstream media. I don't look around on porn websites and what not.

"2. Is Prof Althouse being an agent provcateur to her commenters?"

Just in case you're ever so bored you think that might be better than boredom, I'm hoping you will think again.

"3. Is it a slow news day?"

Ask Buzzfeed.

edutcher said...

I'll bet Drop The Soap is a favorite game.

And I think it's agent provocateuse in her case.

Known Unknown said...

Well, Australia started out as a penile colony, right?

Known Unknown said...

Also, this is how every article should be written. Like a rebus with pictures. None of that paragraph business.

Amartel said...

"You've got to do something that fills in the day."

The article is about the increase in requests for penile implants from the prison population.

Gosh, I'm so bored I need a bigger penis. To fill in the day.

Zee jokes, zhey write zemselves!

Amartel said...

"My brother-in-law is a physician, and frequently works in the ER. You can't even begin to imagine what people stick up their butts"

I have a good friend who is a doctor. The stories about butt spelunking at the ER are astounding.

Most recently: A Lightbulb.
[Pause for pondering.]
Yes, a lightbulb!
It broke, stunning development, and required piece by broken piece extraction.

William said...

As a fad, I don't think this will catch on. But then again I thought the same thing about tattoos and piercings. It's happening among the prison population, and they're the most fashion forward members of society. How long before Kanye West takes it up and Kim Kardashian starts raving about how great it is to screw a guy with a Rolex implanted in his penis? This will not end well.

Unknown said...

"You've got to do something that fills in the day."

Or those pesky boring spaces in the penis.